A matter of perspective

I've been feeling very overwhelmed and unmotivated lately.  Sometimes, I feel as if that is my natural state, since I seem to say that a lot.  But it's true.  The more I have to accomplish, the more I want to run away, until I'm trapped in a corner with my hands over my ears going "LA LA LA!  CAN'T HEAR YOU!!"

I've been having one of those moments the last few weeks.  There are dishes in my sink that are now coated with some sort of nastiness that I don't even want to fathom, because every time I look at them, I just get too overwhelmed to deal with it. 

I had a chat with one of my fellow burlesketeers, Marci Vousplait, a few days ago.  We both made our debuts sometime last year, and both of us remarked how this feeling has set in where we just don't want to work on anything right now.  For me, it's this overwhelming feeling again.  I've accomplished how many acts?  In six months time, I've finished two regular-run acts, one holiday act, worked on another, plus the three iterations of our group act, the Vaudezilla group acts, and our new group act.  It's a lot of work, and a lot of money, and it's gotten to the point where I just have a hard time thinking about it without reflexively watching a few minutes of MacGyver, (or a random Youtube video) just to try and chase it out of my head. 

But I've been thinking about it today.  Because it's really sort of a matter of perspective.  The first thing that helped was writing myself a to-do list.  Just a short blurb to get everything that was nagging at me out of my head, and down on a thing I can look at to remind me.  The next thing was really mentally preparing for showing my latest act in rehearsal tonight.  Normally an activity I dread, this time I concentrated my energies on trying to give a good performance, and really boosted my enthusiasm for getting it accomplished.  And you know what?  It was a zillion times better. 

I know that I have a hard time seeing the forest through all the trees, but I'd like to keep concentrating on the big picture, knocking out one thing at a time, and really attacking these next few weeks.  Because I can accomplish everything on those big, scary to-do lists.  I just have to look at it the right way.